Leadership Lessons: How Will They Remember You?

I heard a Rascal Flatts song the other day that really affected my thoughts as a leader. I realized that, whether we like it or not, as leaders, we’ll be remembered. My question to you is, how will you be remembered? Here’s an excerpt from the song. What does it say to you?

“You’re gonna leave a legacy no matter what you do

It ain’t a question of if they will

It’s how they remember you

Did you stand or did you fall?

Build a bridge or build a wall?

Hide your love or give it all?

What did you do, what did you do?

Did you make them laugh or make them cry?

Did you quit or did you try?

Live your dreams or let them die?

What did you choose, what did you choose?

When it all comes down

It ain’t if, it’s how they remember you”

Interestingly enough, plenty of leaders say that they don’t want to be or care whether they’re remembered. However, you will be remembered for the good and the bad.

“You’re gonna leave a legacy no matter what you do”

Your legacy evolves every shift that you go to work, every interaction that you have with your teammates on or off duty. How do you speak with your team? How do you help your team solve problems? Do you support them and show interest in their work and their personal lives? Do you take time to check on them to see how they’re doing? Do you take time to share a meal or a cup of coffee with them? Are you brave enough to let them vent? Do you know your department’s policies as you should to support them? Are you engaged in the work of your department to help to improve it for them? Is your skill set where it needs to be in your position?

All of these questions dictate how you will be remembered and whether you made a difference in your teammates’ lives. After all, as a leader, isn’t that your most important role?

“Did you stand or did you fall?"

This is an important one. Do you have a code? What do you stand for? Your teammates know whether you stand for something. Your teammates know whether you’ll help them in difficult situations either on an emergency scene or in an administrative setting. If you don’t have a code as a leader and stand for what’s right, rather than who’s right, then how do you expect your teammates to do this? You set this example daily, and you must be cognizant of that, because they are watching, as they should be.

“Build a bridge or build a wall?”

Do you build bridges between the different companies, shifts, ranks, etc., in your department? Do you work with automatic aid and mutual aid through the good and the bad? Are you willing to take the advice of someone in the firehouse who might have a good idea even if that individual has less time on the job than you have?

These are very simple actions that can build relationships, but you must be willing, as a leader, to make the effort. If you don’t, how do you expect the people you are responsible for to do so?

“Hide your love or give it all? What did you do?”

This one might be difficult for you. You are hardened by this job, and in some cases, this doesn’t allow you to show your love for the people who you serve with. Now, I know that it’s a different kind of love, but it still is an emotion that you have for your teammates. (Well, at least I hope that you have that.) How do you show this? Do you say, “Thank you,” to your teammates? Do you tell them that you appreciate them? Do you give them positive reinforcement along with positive documentation that goes in their personnel file? This takes time and effort, but it’s essential.

How can you serve your teammates in a profession where you have your life in each other’s hands and not have a deep sense of caring for them? Your teammates can tell whether you care for them.

“Did you make them laugh or make them cry?”

There are times to be serious and times to keep it light. As a leader, you must be able to balance these two. If you always are serious, your teammates won’t be able to relax around you. If they can’t relax around you, it will be difficult to get to know them and to really understand what makes them tick. If you can’t understand what makes them tick, then you will have a difficult time leading them inside and outside of the firehouse.

Throw out a joke every now and then. Make fun of yourself. Laugh at yourself. It helps everyone, including yourself.

Alternatively, when it’s time to have a difficult conversation, do you make them comfortable in an uncomfortable situation, or do you yell and scream at them until they’re on the verge of tears? We all are human, and we all make mistakes. A mentor of mine says it all of the time: “The day that I have a perfect day is the day that I’ll expect you to have one as well.” Remember, even in times of discipline or corrective action, be nice and just be human.

“Did you quit or did you try?”

An exciting part of your career is that you get to see each other grow personally and professionally. You see firefighters begin their career and as they progress through the ranks. You see their successes and their failures. They also see your successes and your failures. They see you go through promotional processes and witness whether you’re successful or not. If you don’t get promoted and quit trying to improve for said promotion, what kind of example does that set?

You must inspire your firefighters to be brave enough to try even in light of the fact that failure is possible. Teach them to try and fail rather than quit and never know.

“Live your dreams or let them die”

As leaders, we all have dreams. Remember, your teammates have dreams, too, and it’s your responsibility to guide them and to help them to achieve their dreams. You must give teammates opportunities to grow personally and professionally, so they don’t let their dreams die.

A dream doesn’t have to be one that is world-changing; a dream is what each individual teammate envisions. You must respect that and then help them on their journey. Sometimes that means giving direction, sometimes that means giving space, but it always means that you must inspire them to keep reaching and to keep growing.

“When it all comes down, it ain’t if, it’s how they remember you”

This point ties it all together. The words are so true and so powerful. Think about the leaders who you had? Do you remember them? Of course, you do. The question is, how do you remember them? That’s a totally different question with varying answers depending on the leader.

The good news: You control how you’re remembered by your teammates. If you have the self-awareness that you affect people as a leader every day, you can do amazing things for your teammates, for your department and for your community.

You are the leader. You are the example. People look to you for direction, for inspiration, for guidance, caring and something to believe in. Provide it all and be the leader, because “When it all comes down, it ain’t if, it’s how they remember you.”